My pandemic kick in head

Oh, how the pandemic has kicked me in the head, let me count the ways. I was just about to start a tour guide business, when COVID-19 kept the tourists from the tulips and daffodil fields, which was probably the safest place to breathe.

Nope, couldn’t even peacefully breathe out on a deserted bayside dike, got quite harshly booted by a minion from the Department of Fish and Wildlife, “didn’t” you read the sign!? Yeah, nobody within a half a mile, I guess it’s best that my at-risk ass, go get closer to the virus, that I thought we were supposed to avoid.

I spent the tourist season, practicing f...