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Who says you can never find a cop when you need one?

Certainly not two local motorists allegedly harassed last month by the 61-year-old driver of a Ford Escape who later told Swinomish Tribal Police she was the female Jesus Christ and that the right side of her body had vampiric tendencies.

The suspect, a resident of Walla Walla but who most recently had been living at a Mount Vernon RV park, was taken into custody and transported to Skagit Valley Hospital for evaluation after having been led by the tormented drivers into the tribal police department parking lot.

Prior to that, she had chased a 24-year-old Shelter Bay woman throughout La Conner, rear-ending her car twice. She also rear-ended the vehicle driven by a 66-year-old Swinomish resident after crossing Rainbow Bridge westbound.

Both victims fled and found safety by driving to the tribal police office.

Swinomish Police were able to stop the suspect after she sped along Moorage Way and through the Swinomish Fish Company parking and loading areas.

Officers said they could tell the suspect driver was “in some sort of mental crisis.”

The two motorists she pursued were understandably upset as well.

The 24-year-old told police she was driving to Pioneer Market when the suspect began following her closely northbound on Maple Avenue. The Shelter Bay resident took several turns in La Conner to elude the suspect, who continued following her, nearly hitting her repeatedly before backing off.

The victim became alarmed and decided to drive to the Swinomish Tribal Police Department for help from on-duty officers. While en route, she called 9-1-1 to report the incident. As she spoke to the police dispatcher she was twice struck by the suspect vehicle.

After being rear-ended the second time, she sped past the vehicle in front of her on Rainbow Bridge and continued to the tribal police office. The suspect then closely followed the car driven by the Swinomish resident, rear-ending her vehicle as its driver made a right turn onto Front Street before also fleeing to the tribal police station.

Police saw the suspect vehicle speeding without headlights on through a residential area despite dark conditions and little ambient light. After a brief pursuit, the suspect was stopped in the police parking lot.

The suspect told police she had been drinking wine in her vehicle prior to being stopped and that she started drinking wine almost daily about three years ago when “God told her that she shouldn’t let her flesh body get too saline.”

She said while living at the RV park she was attempting to do “God’s work.”

According to police accounts, the suspect also said she had created the planet and was forced by King Solomon to give birth to hundreds of children.

As for the traffic issue, the suspect blamed it on the female side of her body.

She said the two halves of her body are separated into male and female sections, the male left side named Viggio and female right side called Harry. The suspect said that Harry likes to go fast, and Harry was the one controlling the speed of her car.

She told police she “didn’t want to go fast, but Harry made her because people were being mean to her.”

The suspect said she had not been taking medication prescribed her for a medical condition. Officers determined the suspect was unable to control her actions and was a potential danger to others and drove her to the hospital. Her vehicle was impounded with charges pending.